sex with

Organized by Julia Rothman
Coming in 2020 from Little, Brown and Company

Sample Stories

Here’s a variety of sample stories about sexual exploration, abuse, pregnancy, first times, with the sort of relaxed story-telling style we’re looking for.

read some sample stories

About the Book

Sex with Every Body is a modern guide to real sex written by everybody, for everybody. Sex is complicated, and it’s never been more complicated than now. From a president who brags about grabbing pussies while simultaneously pushing abstinence-only sex education, to the proliferation of porn, to the explosion of identities and sexual preferences, our expectations about what’s “normal” shift constantly. But there’s no one way to have sex, and there’s nothing “normal” about any body, orientation, identity, or experience.

This book will corral hundreds of voices and pictures into a single inclusive, nonjudgmental, and visually arresting volume. There isn’t anything this book won’t talk about. Hundreds of deeply personal stories—both humorous and serious—will take the shame out of stigmatized topics and help readers feel less alone. Realizing that other people have had similar feelings of excitement and pleasure, as well as all the embarrassing, scary, or unfulfilling situations, helps us become more confident in our life choices, and ultimately better understand and accept ourselves and one another. Reading these stories is more than a voyeuristic thrill; it’s an important empathy-building, consciousness-raising exercise. And it’s how we’ll start to build a radically more inclusive dialogue around sex and our bodies.

We’ll also include essays and interviews from perspectives as wide-ranging as a high school health teacher, a sex shop clerk, a gynecologist, a urologist, a social worker, a disability activist, a sex columnist, a trans-activist, a senior couple, teen parents, a sexual assault survivor, a sex addict, a person living with HIV, a dominatrix, and more.

Aesthetically, instead of feeling like a dry educational textbook, the book will be jam-packed with colorful artwork on every page. Julia Rothman (the book’s editor) will create some of the artwork herself but, echoing the “every voice” angle of the text, Rothman also taps her deep network of artist friends to contribute illustrations and comics. From this diverse group of artists, we see authentic inclusion of the full spectrum of body types, identities, sexual orientations, and experiences.

Julia Rothman authored/illustrated twelve books and collaborated with distinguished others like Jane Fonda (on her YA body and sex book Being A Teen), Liv Tyler, Design Sponge, Top Chef’s Gail Simmons and chef Anita Lo. Her illustrations have appeared in The New York Times, The New Yorker, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, Harper’s, The Atlantic, Popular Science, Food & Wine and more. She co-founded Women Who Draw, teaches at the School of Visual Arts, and leads workshops around New York City. She is open to suggestion and wants to hear from everybody. Get in touch at juliaaprilrothman@gmail.com

Author’s Note

My mom was always open with me about sex. When I was eleven years old, she sat me down on my bed and said, “You can ask me anything you want about sex. Anything!” Before that moment, I had accidentally seen a book of sex positions, looked up orgasm in the dictionary, and read a book rife with incest by V.C. Andrews. I felt pretty educated. But, there was something I still wanted to know. So I asked my mom, “How often do you and Daddy have sex?” My mom took a deep breath, “That, I can’t tell you. That’s personal.”  

I grew up on City Island in the Bronx, New York. When my best friend and I were sixteen, we snuck into Manhattan to go dancing at clubs using fake IDs. Once, I met an older college guy and he drove to our house to visit me. He wasn’t allowed in my bedroom, so we took a walk. I don’t want to tell you what happened when we went into the schoolyard. But, I do want to write about it anonymously in this book. And I also want to write about my first time, an STI scare, and how much fun I once had in the back of a taxi. 

The summer before I started high school, the book, Our Bodies, Ourselves, moved from my older sister’s shelf to mine. It was full of real people’s stories about first times, masturbation, and self-esteem. I cherished it—so much so that I also bought teen magazines just to read the sections where readers wrote in their most embarrassing moments: A period stain in math class, farting on a date, a French kiss gone wrong. These made me feel less alone. 

For many years, I imagined making an entire book of stories like those—frank, real, warm, personal stories about sex, bodies, sexuality, and so much more. But I sat on the book proposal for a long time because I was scared. I didn’t know if I could be the editor of a book about sex, especially when I was no expert. I didn’t know if I would be able to convince enough people to share their experiences. And, I didn’t know if a publisher would believe in the concept. But, I started pitching it to friends and colleagues at social gatherings. “Oh! I’ve got a story for your book!” many of them would say. People were eager to be a part of it. They told me stories that were funny, sad, scary and surprising. They told me tales about sex work, fetishes, abusive relationships, threesomes, their pregnancy, and visiting sex clubs. Sometimes I asked them if I could record their accounts and we’d move to the back of the bar where it was quieter. I would turn on my phone’s voice memo. Once I collected enough stories, I knew there was no turning back.

I’m so happy to be sharing this project with you. I can’t wait to hear your stories.

xoJulia

Get In Touch

If you have a longer story to tell, don’t want to be anonymous in the book, have a suggestion for a topic or someone to get in touch with, or have any other questions, thoughts or ideas, get in touch with the author at juliaaprilrothman@gmail.com with subject line Every Body thoughts.